The thing about the truth.

3 Feb

Have you ever had a genuine reason for being late to something important, but instead of just settling for the truth (sorry, I set my alarm for PM instead of AM), you decide that the best thing to do is embellish the story until there’s simply no way that being late can be in any way mistaken for your fault?

Sorry, my flatmate has been quietly manufacturing drugs in the hallway cupboard, our landlord sprang a surprise inspection last night and evicted us, I slept at my brother’s house, and his new girlfriend believes that the radiation from alarm clocks cause cancer, so she wouldn’t let me use one inside, hence I camped on the front lawn, only to be awoken by a small truck crashing through the fence, pinning my tent against the side of the house, and forcing me to burrow beneath the ground with a teaspoon for several kilometres, where I came up in a mud puddle and had to go back and change my shirt, which is why I’m fifteen minutes late.

And for some reason, in your head, that seems more compelling than the truth ever could be.

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5 Responses to “The thing about the truth.”

  1. Aimee February 3, 2010 at 10:29 am #

    Tell the whole world why don’t ya!

    • jonoaidney February 3, 2010 at 10:36 am #

      Meth for dinner!

      • Aimee February 3, 2010 at 11:28 am #

        I don’t need dinner thanks to meth. You can finish the sausages in the fridge.

  2. jonoaidney February 3, 2010 at 11:38 am #

    Zing!

    • jonoaidney February 3, 2010 at 11:39 am #

      My blog just stepped down another rung on the ladder of professionalism.

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